As a pedestrian and cyclist I am acutely aware of the danger lazy selfish ignorant and negligent drivers place me in with deliberate reckless indifference. I’ve had enough. Drivers who use their mobile phones when driving distract themselves from paying attention to the road and therefore choose to undermine the safety of others. Their choice to behave in this manner indicates that they value their social circumstances more than the lives of others.

zil863 introducing Fonetard

Whereas legacy media corporations are too afraid of offending their bogan audience to name and shame them, I’m not. Not surprisingly, a study has shown that the most driving offences, like using a phone while driving, are perpetuated in the most bogan suburbs.

Other studies have shown that banning the use of phones while driving reduces accidents and saves lives, but many people simply don’t seem to care. When a Victorian police officer was caught driving while on the phone, and the police claimed they are exempt from the law, it is evident that the state does not take its own laws seriously.

If the law exists because it is proven that being distracted mentally and not having the use of both hands compromises a driver physically, then there is no plausible excuse for the police claiming to be above the law. What awful leadership.

In the absence of coherent leadership, vigilante citizen activism may be more effective. I’ve been planning this since a scary encounter with a violent phone using driver in 2007, and I’m pleased to announce my new project, Fonetard, which is partially inspired by Rigid Mount.

In 2008, I pitched the idea for this site to the TAC, the Minister for Police and the Police Commissioner. They all rejected it. Since then, with the proliferation of mobile phones, the problem has become significantly worse. While I can’t replicate the full plan, I can name and shame the drivers who threaten my safety.

The government is incompetent, the police are corrupt and most of the citizenry is criminally negligent. If we want it to stop, we must act. We must hold them all to account and demand change.

introducing Fonetard

5 thoughts on “introducing Fonetard

  • 18 December 2012 at 8:02 am

    Couldn’t agree with you more Brian. So sick of seeing these selfish people on the roads putting others lives at risk. I have already ordered a dash cam as seen on such programs as a current affair as it seem that drivers are just getting worse and worse on the roads and mobile phones is a big issue.
    I’m willing to bet the bogan in your photo above is one of those who routinely dispose of their cigarettes on the road too. I have an app on my phone courtesy of the EPA for those people, I would encourage others to use it as well!

  • 19 December 2012 at 8:18 am

    Great idea Brian. Perhaps the site could expand its parameters to include those dimwits who like to walk down busy streets while texting, making other pedestrians step out of their way.

    Its a great shame that the City of Yarra no longer leaves drain openings unfenced when it undertakes maintenance….

  • 20 December 2012 at 10:43 am

    Like the idea.

    Maybe a section for morons who drive the wrong way down one way streets??

  • 22 December 2012 at 9:07 am

    I do agree with you, I really do. But my god your writing is so pretentious and OTT sometimes… you remind me of my 16 year old cousin who just read 1984, writes poetry and demands to be taken very seriously!!

    Have a wonderful Christmas Brian and a safe happy new year x

  • 27 December 2012 at 5:43 pm

    Can we add Dooftard/Hoontard to the list too? Mind you, probably the same people as Fonetard anyway.

    I love the erratic, why-the-fuck-are-you-braking?!?! shenanigans you get to ‘enjoy’ when you’re stuck behind one of these selfish eejits. However, instead of this sort of behaviour declining as the message gets through (pardon the pun) it actually appears to be getting a lot worse.

    Maybe a short viral youtube montage about a crack team of Fonetard Hunters using loud-hailers to embarrass the selfish dickheads would do the trick, with the video evidence being handed over to the cops afterwards?


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